Entries in Womankind (99)


Leaving the Dream Man (by Jessie)


“When a woman starts to disentangle herself from patriarchy, ultimately she is abandoned to her own self.”-Sue Monk Kidd, Dance of the Dissident Daughter

The Wheel of Power and Control is like a wagon wheel. Physical and sexual violence are the metal rim around the edge. The spokes are all the other ways an abuser gains control—threats, emotional abuse, minimizing, using children, etc. Something like 1 in 3 women are going to be victims of domestic abuse, but I would guess that every woman in her lifetime experiences someone who uses these techniques to gain control over them.

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An Apology To The Moms At The Bar (by Elizabeth Engle)


Dear Moms at the Bar...

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Sometimes You Just Have to Laugh

After reading some of the comments in the confessional, Mrs. G. felt she should post this to lighten things up. As you can see, confessors, you are not alone.



Like Chapter 11, but for poorer people

Simple Valentine free creative commons

Photo by Pink Sherbert Photography

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and while Mrs. G. tends to avoid it for fear that she will stray into the problematic vicinity of plagiarism, in this instance, she is pretty sure she is in the clear.

A few weeks back, the Bloggess (if you don't know her, you should) wrote a post called Like Oprah, but for poor people in which she listed her favorite (mostly) affordable things and asked her readers to share the same. Mrs. G. spent a hefty chunk of time over three days reading the thousands of comments and writing down interesting items she would like to try. She jotted down several of them for future Christmas, birthday and Mother's Day wish lists.

Mrs. G. thought it would be fun to do the same thing here at the Manor.

Mrs. G's Current Favorite Things

~Acure Moroccan Argan Oil Shampoo ($8.79) and Conditioner ($8.79)...Mrs. G. is always on the lookout for hair care products that combat frizz. Once a week, she works a liberal amount of the conditioner into her hair, puts on a bandana and leaves it in overnight. The next day she rinses it out (no shampooing) and her hair feels soft, silky and less frizzled. This stuff smells great too.

~Trader Joe's Fig Butter ($2.29)...Pour this over brie cheese to spread on crackers or sliced baguette and you will win friends and influence people. For those who don't have a Trader Joe's, Mrs. G. feels your pain. You can probably find something similar at your local grocery store (fig jam or preserves would do the trick) or purchase it for a ridiculous price at Amazon.

~Lord Krishna's Cuisine: The Art of Indian Vegetarian Cooking ($9.00-$26.00)...Indian food is a favorite at Mrs. G's house and this (according to Mrs. G's friend from Mumbai) is THE cookbook every Indian food lover should have in her kitchen. Mrs. G. can attest it is a great cookbook for shitty cooks ambivalent chefs.

~Ruby Jewel Ice Cream Sandwiches ($3.99 each)...Pricey but have you ever wondered what God tastes like? Here's your answer. Mrs. G's favorites are the Lemon Cookie with Honey Lavender ice cream and the Chocolate Cookie with Salted Caramel ice cream. 

~Jenny Lawson's (The Bloggess) book Let's Pretend This Never Happened ($12.09)...Easily the funniest book Mrs. G. has read this year (and, frankly, beyond). The chapter where Jenny's husband Victor stops to collect a dead rattlesnake out of the middle of the road is worth the purchase price alone.

~Dr. Teals Epsom Salt Soaking Solution ($4.89)...Mrs. G. takes her hydrotherapy seriously and this is her favorite bath product and it is so reasonably priced for a 3 lb. bag. It's good for relaxing, easing aches and pains and moisturizing skin. It also comes in other delicious flavors and looks pretty in an apothecary jar. You can find it at most chain drugstores. 

~Netflix...it's still the best deal in town. Here are Mrs. G's current much loved picks: Murder in Suburbia, Call the Midwife, Top of the Lake, The FallSafety Not Guaranteed and The Lie.

~Straight Up Food...Mr. and Mrs. G. are straight up carnivores, but they are trying to eliminate some meat from their weekly diet. Mrs. G. loves this blog. She has tried enough of the recipes to recommend it to those of you who want to add more veggies to your diet.

~The Feline Arts Council...just that it exists makes it a Mrs. G. favorite.

~Humans of New York Facebook Page...Mrs. G. gets something humorous or meaningful from this page every day.

~Second Skin Moist Burn Pads ($6.99)...The G. house is never without these in the first aid kit. If you get a minor burn, these pads will eliminate the pain (almost immediately) and help the burn heal. Mrs. G. has a runner friend who puts these on blisters so she can keep her crazy ass running without discomfort.

~ The Hugh Jackman Bra...still in the pre-production phase.


OK, your turn. Give it up for your favorite stuff.


She Interrupts This Day For A Blast Of Just Terrific

Summer Sidewalk Chalk Rainbow

Name one good thing that has happened to you today. Come on, just one, or three.

You woke up, that's one.





Woman Build 2013!

Dear Derf Sisters,

I’m Ri-Len Lukens, but you can call me Ray. Some residents of the Women’s Colony may remember reading about my experiences in architecture school. The good news is that I graduated, found work, and had a grand time helping to design Head Start preschools and low income housing until October of 2008.  Remember October of 2008? If not, this will jog your memory: it was the last time anyone was building Head Start Preschools or low-income housing.

Before the concrete truck arrives

The great news is that I am serving with Americorps. It’s like the domestic Peace Corps. Only instead of cataloging the lost tribes of New Guinea, I bring civilization to the wilds of Hillsboro, Oregon. And by civilization, I mean power tools. My assignment is to lead crews at Habitat for Humanity. I teach volunteers and homeowners the skills they need to build homes. The really exciting part is that we are about to break ground on the 2013 Women’s Build. A Women’s Build isn’t about excluding men. It is about giving women the opportunity to gain skills and confidence by working with an all-women team of crew leaders, volunteers and tradeswomen in a supportive and empowering building environment.

The best secret boyfriends in the world, and lots of coffee

It is the best job in the world.

Making a solid foundation

Ray and Nanette

Seriously, who would not love working with Nanette, who spends her Saturdays on site climbing into crawlspaces and roaming the rooftops to help build simple, decent, affordable housing for working families? Nan also blogs about the Women’s Build.  There’s a Facebook page, so anyone who is interested can follow our exploits adventures extremely serious work. I do not use Facebook, but Nan assures me that anyone who uses Facebook can help the project along just by visiting the page and liking it. I have no idea what that means. It has something to do with the little thumbs-up thingies. We really need the support.  If you want to see what Nan looked like after the concrete pour in the photos, see the evidence here.

Nanette, Paula, a few other women, and myself are seriously outnumbered by the fellas hereabouts.  Please consider getting involved with Willamette West Habitat for Humanity’s Women’s Build, or seeing if your local Habitat affiliate has one planned. Come as you are. I’ll supply the power tools.



Mrs. G's Holiday Home Photos #4


Mrs. G. got together with her friends Jill and Brenda today. They try to get together once a week or so for coffee to visit and solve the world's problems. A few weeks ago, Mrs. G. and her family celebrated Thanksgiving with Brenda (above) and her family. After dinner they played a game called Loaded Questions. One of the questions was: What is something you really wanted for Christmas as a kid but never received? One of the many things that makes Brenda an ace friend is that she listens. Today she showed up and, out of the blue, gave Mrs. G. her most coveted childhood toy -- an Easy Bake Oven. 

Off to bake Lilliputian cupcakes. Thanks pal. You're a good egg.

Also, doesn't Brenda have most excellent hair?


another shallow form of procrastination?

It's 4:32pm, Mrs. G. hasn't even thought about cooking dinner or glittered any of her motherfucking gourds. She did manage to write her 1,000 words a day and fold a half of load of laundry. She'll get to the other half tomorrow.

So in an effort to avoid scrubbing the tub or mopping the kitchen floor, it occured to her that now would be a really good time to get to know each other. Ask Mrs. G. any question and she will answer it honestly. She will also ask some of you questions and you can decide if you want to answer honestly or lie. She'll never know the difference.

Put down what you're doing. Let your family make sandwiches for dinner and lets have a Thursday night derf hootenanny!